


The Truth Is Out There

by stupidityisdangerous



Category: IT (1990), IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Conspiracy Theories, Drabble, F/M, Headcanon, Humor, Minor Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Stanley Uris-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 14:02:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16914207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupidityisdangerous/pseuds/stupidityisdangerous
Summary: Stanley Uris believes every conspiracy theory.





	The Truth Is Out There

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on [Tumblr](http://shady-sink.tumblr.com/).

Stanley Uris believes every conspiracy theory—even if he’d never admit it. He’s had an iPhone since 2007 but has always covered his cameras, and it takes years for the Losers to convince him to even make a Facebook. It drives all the others crazy, even Mike has gone into a screaming fit before over Stanley’s unrelenting insistence that the moon landing was faked, and once he scared Ben half to death by going in-depth during an especially intense conversation involving the Illuminati. Richie makes jokes about Stan being a Flat Earther, but Stanley doesn’t find anything funny on the matter. In fact, Stanley Uris considers himself a rather sensible man, even if he met Lea Michele in 2009 and has her autograph framed in his living room, but still isn’t convinced that she can read. He is absolutely convinced that Avril Lavigne, Gucci Mane, Kanye West, and Beyoncé have all been replaced by clones, but he thinks that Marilyn Monroe, Elvis Presley, Amy Winehouse, and Brittany Murphy still walk this earth. There’s always a stack of trashy gossip magazines somewhere in the Uris household, and Patty is never the one reading them. Even the others get in on his obsession from time to time, and he and Eddie have gone as far as to exchange letters discussing the latest theories—because who knows what the government could pick up if they dare text or speak on the phone?


End file.
